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 An Adoption Story

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Green Bay TJ

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Join date : 2012-07-09
Age : 57
Location : Bel Air, MD

PostSubject: An Adoption Story   Fri Jul 20, 2012 11:32 pm

When my wife and I got married, we decided we wanted a family. After trying the usual means for a while with no result, we went to a fertility clinic. After trying several attempts at what was in our budget – with no success – my wife wanted to look into adoption. For whatever reason I was not ready to consider adoption at that time.

Fast forward about 6 years. I don’t know what changed but one day I bring up the topic of adoption with my wife. After we talked about it and she convinced herself I was serious and ready for this, we started talking about what type of adoption we wanted to do. Given we were now somewhat older than many couples looking to adopt, we felt it would be difficult to do a domestic adoption.

We ended up going through an agency with international adoption programs. At the information meeting we found out about programs in China, Guatemala, and the FSU. Since I wanted a boy, and for other reasons I won’t go into here, we decided on Guatemala. This was around February 2002. After several months of seemingly endless paperwork and social worker visits for our home study, our application as potential adoptive parents was accepted. During the time we waited for our application to be accepted, we had a major medical setback when my wife had a heart attack at 40. I was very distraught over the possibility of losing her, she was distraught over the possibility of losing any chance of a referral, but after her cardiologist assured the agency her long term outlook was good, we were back on track. Now we just had to wait for a referral. In late September 2002, we received the call! We met with the case worker at the agency on 27 September 2002 and were told our son was born a week earlier. We were so excited!

Most parents who go through international adoptions will pick a new name for the baby. At some point before we received our referral, we discussed the name William. That was my paternal grandfather’s name, as well as my wife’s brother-in-law’s name and the name of her nephew. So our son would be named William. Imagine our surprise when the case worker told us our son’s birth mother had named him William. Not Guillermo – the Spanish equivalent of William - but the English name William.

There were many months of anguish and turmoil as we waited to bring William home. We visited him in Guatemala for several days in February 2003. What a sad day when we had to come home and leave him in Guatemala. If you think it is bad dealing with US government agencies at times, just imagine what it is like dealing with one from another country when we do not speak the native language. We had quite an emotional roller coaster in 2003, but we got through it all and in late August 2003 “Gotcha” day came and we brought William home.

I recall once when my wife and I were talking about how I had changed my mind about adoption. She told me that God must have touched my heart. As I think about this, my decision to adopt had to have come right around the time that my son was conceived. The case worker at the agency once told us that every child ends up with the family he or she belongs to. Being a dad is awesome and I can’t imagine a life without our son. Even when he does stuff that totally frustrates me, he is truly a blessing from God. I just want him to grow up to be a better man and a better Christian than I am.

Now I don’t really believe in fate or pre-determined destiny. I believe God has given us free will to make our own choices. Otherwise I would have a hard time accepting a God who would put a child on this earth only to ultimately become a victim of a drunk driver. I can accept that the decision for that driver to drink was of his/her own free will. However, I do believe that God presents opportunities to us to choose certain paths, and I believe with all my heart that the path that lead us to adopt William was one of these.

Now when I read the Bible I love the adoption stories. There are several stories, like Mephibosheth and David, Esther and Mordecai, Ruth and Naomi. Moses was adopted by Pharoah’s daughter, and Jesus was adopted by Joseph. And what is the New Testament if not an adoption story of all of us as God’s children, brothers and sisters in Christ?

Earlier this year I participated in a Bible study of the Gospel of John at church. I think I was the only one in the group who had not gone through Disciple; many of the congregation at church had gone through both Disciple I and Disciple II. One night we were discussing a topic from Disciple I - what do we consider our personal faith statement. Over the course of the next week I decided that my faith statement is “Jesus is the coolest big brother ever” (metaphorically speakng, of course). Not the kind of brother who gives you wedgies, but the kind of big brother who looks after his brothers and sisters and would lay his life down for his family. When I’ve been bad or done things I’m ashamed of, he’s the kind of big brother I can go to and ask him to make things right with the Father – isn’t that exactly what we do when we pray in his name? He’s the kind of big brother who is there to pick us up when we fall. When his disciples asked him to show them how to pray, he didn’t pray to “my Father,” but to “Our Father.” Isn’t this an act of inclusion for all of us as children of God? Yes, Jesus is my Lord and Savior, he will be our judge, but isn’t he also just the coolest big brother ever?
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XterraXtian
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PostSubject: Re: An Adoption Story   Fri Jul 27, 2012 12:22 am

dance dance dance

I LOVE this!!! group hug

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